How I Created a Soft Life for Myself (6 Ways)

What is a Soft Life? Well the definition I love that I found on TickTok (yes I am on there now... I know) is 'A life of ease, peace, comfort and intentional happiness. It does not require struggle love, stress and distress. It consists of mutual relationships, clarity and self care.'

Well, doesn't that sounds nice! The last few years I made some realisations about life that have made me slow down and change direction slightly. Since even before the pandemic I changed my views quite considerably on a lot of things including the way I wanted to live my life. 

30 months later and I have transitioned to a 'soft life' I have changed jobs, now how my own space where I can relax (not trapped in awful house shares) I have hobbies I love,  and I regularly nurture my body. So here are some of the changes I have made to move to my version of a 'Soft Life' where I am much more contented and secure in myself ...

1. Embracing my Femininity 

I have been documenting my journey with the feminine on my blog, writing some of the things I have learned and enjoying sharing my journey. One of the biggest lessons that it has taught me is how to be still, how to not control outcomes or analyse situations to just flow away from them. This has helped relive a lot of the stress in my life, realising that other peoples problems are not my problem and not feeling that I have to fix issues.

2. Work Life Balance 

The lockdown forced many of us to work from home but that had been my dream for a long time. Transitioning to a role where I can work from home has been the best decision career wise I have ever made. Personally, I always found working in an office extremely stressful as I feel that I spend more energy and time managing other people and their personalities than actually on my job. My first job out of university was so stressful (coupled with stressful living and relationship situations) that I was physically ill for over a year and had a stress rash over my stomach and back for 6 months that nothing seemed to help. Moving to a WFH situation has cleared many of the health issues I used to experience and allowed me to look forward to work in a way that I never did before; it has also allowed me to eat better and cooking a lovely lunch everyday for myself is one of my favourite ways to nourish my body. 

3. Spending More Time in Nature 

For the past 2 years I have been trying to spend more time outdoors hiking, swimming and generally enjoying being in nature. This has helped me increase my confidence and led to me exploring more hobbies that I never thought I would like paddle boarding. 

4. Nurturing My Body 

This is something I have been focusing on quite heavily over the last year exploring how to nurture my body and become more focused on my health. I've started to consume more content around nutrition which is important and a key part of my own personal philosophy on stopping the environmental crisis and the privatisation and control of our food. I've also expanded my knowledge on hormones and how to live a healthier life so I can manage my stress and deal with my bodies inflammation better.

I have also been trying lots of new therapy's like light therapy, sound therapy, infra red sauna, cryotherapy and detoxing with colonics and supplements. It has all helped me improve my health and wellbeing and I have learned loads about my own body!

Nourishing your body is important if you want to live a less stressful life as a healthy body will improve the way you deal with stress and other mental health issues.

5. Turning My Back on Consumer Culture 

This has really been key for me to improve my life and manage my stress. Living a soft life for me means living close to nature in a simple way without the need for external fleeting material things and a consumer mindset. If you are constantly consuming you can't be a peace and you will be constantly looking for the next thing to consume. Unplugging from this system means not feeling the pressure to look or have certain things melts away. I wrote a blog post here about how I have done this for myself and the impact on my mental health was huge.

6. Building a Stronger Relationship With My Family 

You realise as you get older how important it is to have a strong relationship with your family and just how much love and joy they bring to your life. We often place a lot of value in our modern society on friends and very little on family, dismissing their opinions and feelings or cutting them out if they are 'toxic'. Many people don't bother spending time with elderly relatives but are happy to go out clubbing every weekend.

While I was growing up I did not have good relationships with my close family and it took me a long time to get to a place where I could make peace with them. Family relationships are difficult and tumultuous but they are where we learn the most. Learning forgiveness, understanding differences and accepting conflict are only things that we can truly learn when we have a blood bond. I don't believe that people can live a life of peace and ease if they have conflict with their family and I would be wary of people who have familial issues. Healing my relationships with family members but still holding my boundaries has taught me a lot and brought a lot of peace to my life.

EB XX